Monday, 2 May 2016

Slam dunk

There will always be some aspects of human behaviour that we don't understand.
The internet is filled to bursting with activities that are bizarre, perverse, dangerous or immoral, but sometimes it can be the simplest of things. Things we see all around us every day that leave us confused and shaking our heads in disbelief.
It might be someones insistence on drying their laundry in a tumble dryer even though it's a bright sunny day. It could be a person who claims to love music but then goes and listens to Skrillex, or when someone spends an hour cleaning their car with a pressure washer when it could be done in twenty minutes with a bucket of water and a sponge.

One of the peculiarities of human behaviour that I will never understand is the practice of dunking biscuits in tea.
I love a good cup of tea and I also enjoy a nice biscuit or six, but as far as I'm concerned the two should not meet until they're already in my stomach.
This subject is a strongly contested one, with pro-dunkers and anti-dunkers perpetually at loggerheads. The dunkers are most emphatic that their way is the right way, with extensive research performed to discover the best biscuits for dunking. Apparently the pensioner's favourite 'Rich Tea' is the Chuck Norris of biscuits for dunking, and I suppose it's worth knowing these things if you're a dunking enthusiast who doesn't want their tea ruined by a pile of biscuity mush in the bottom of the cup.
But I'm keen to enjoy my biscuits the way the baker intended, with the right amount of crunch and tasting of flour, butter, sugar, and whatever else was added to the mix. Surely if you want your biscuit to taste of tea then you might as well just eat Rich Tea and be done with it.
Perhaps the problem is that Rich Tea are a crappy excuse for a biscuit, leaving a gaping hole in the market for a biscuit that tastes of tea but actually has a pleasing texture, like a tea-flavoured Hob Nob or similar.

For me though, I'm quite happy to enjoy my biscuits independent of my tea in the same way that I keep water separate from whisky - I enjoy them both but why would I want to dilute the Whisky experience with water? Maybe I can understand someone diluting some cheap harsh blended stuff like Bell's or Famous Grouse, but when you're talking about a nice single malt like Talisker it would be sacrilege to add anything else.
I once even heard someone say they liked to add lemonade to their whisky FFS!
There are some things that work well with others such as lamb and mint sauce, or Dave Gahan and Martin Gore, but others are better left to fly solo and tea and biscuits are perfect examples of such things.