Saturday, 1 February 2014

Oh, the shame....

Occasionally we all do things that go against our better judgement. We set certain standards for ourselves and strive to live up to them to the best of our ability but once in a while, despite our best efforts, we falter.
What I did today makes me feel shameful and dirty, as I've violated my own code of ethics and now feel as though all that I believe and hold dear has been shat on from a great height.
It pains me to admit here and now that today I gave in to pressure from the other members of the household and installed a TV aerial and paid up for a TV license.
I'm not sure if I'm ever going to be able to look at myself in the mirror again and be in the least bit happy with what I see because I caved in on something and all I'll ever see looking back at me is someone who didn't stand up for their beliefs.
In the same way that Christians believed that rock and roll was the work of the devil, I still firmly believe that advertising comes from the very same source, and nowhere else is it so prevalent than in the land of television. The last year or more with no broadcast TV and only watching streaming programmes and DVDs has been absolute bliss for me. It's like being able to buy an electrical product without being asked if you want to buy an extended warranty. It's like a Big Mac without a pickle. Or like riding a motorcycle without ending up in hospital with an exploded knee, which by the way has now healed completely leaving me with just the physiotherapy to deal with. No more crutches, but still in need of a little support from a walking stick which is sort of OK as it gives a little bit of 'House MD' cool.
As for the TV thing, I'm at least thankful that nobody in the house is in the least bit interested in soap operas or reality TV shows. It's hard enough to avoid looking at a TV even when it's showing something you're not interested in, so the idea of actually giving a toss about who's being voted off the latest programme featuring forgotten celebrities in a last ditch attempt at media exposure before sinking in the eternal pit of UK Gold forevermore, leaves me with shivers running down my spine.
This is a point that is beautifully demonstrated by the phenomenon of putting TVs in pubs. Now let's get this straight once and for all. A television does not belong in pub. A pub is a place to sit with friends putting the world to rights over numerous beers. I believe it's known as conversation, which is an ancient art form that is being lost to the modern world, like suppressing farts whilst in company. There is nothing quite as effective at killing a conversation as a mute television showing a wildlife documentary or sports event. We have TVs at home, and we can even watch stuff on our phones so why the hell does the last retreat of man need one stuck on the wall interfering with the essential process of resolving important issues such as world debt, immigration, and who can drink the most pints before needing a piss.
My only conclusion is that pub landlords figure that customers will spend more if they're not having to stop drinking in order to enthusiastically inform their peers why a Ferrari is better than a Porsche even though they haven't ever driven either of them.
Television is evil and the world would be a better place if nobody was being brainwashed by the constant stream of mental pollution it throws at you.
Although having said that it does appear that the Superbowl is on tomorrow night.....